As you've already heard clearly, I didn't like coming to the site to listen to the end of the show either.

But I have to say, you were right to wonder whether this story needed completing...I don't think there was much added here that was of interest (sorry to Nicole). The topic itself is very interesting, and bullying is something incredibly important to recognise & address, but I think the story as it was in the podcast I downloaded was fine as it was.

I wish Nicole all the best though & hope things improve for her.

I am not a fan of facebook though I am a fan of TSWI. I don't like hearing "hit the like button" either. There is no way I would give any info about my "likes" out over social media, I'm afraid TSWI is no exception. Anonymous forums & personal recommendations, sure, but not Facebook.

Very unsatisfying story, not just because we had to go to the website to get it. I came for answers and was simply left hanging ... instead of answering the "why" questions, Nicole kept blaming herself and never followed up with her own very rational observation: "this isn't normal behavior." As she tells the story it is clear people were deliberately sabotaging her, yet this was never followed up by the interviewer. Nicole's life and health were seriously damaged, but the context on female bullying was never presented ... thankfully given by Jacqueline's comment above (she even uses the word "surreal" like Nicole) Anyway I hope Nicole (and others) can get some perspective and not internalize so much (yes it is "something about you," but that something is likely a positive something that others resent).

How too familiar was the story of Nicole on bullying! My experience with a mob of female bullies 10 years ago parallels in so many ways what she went through: sabotage, insults, systematic undermining, exclusion of meetings or training, transformation of facts, behind closed doors haranguing and belittling, threats of dismissal for cause that would affect my prospect of future employment, etc. And this, overnight after years of uneventful and even productive work.

Indeed, one stops to eat, to sleep, and to trust both oneself and the others. As Nicole said, the worse of it all, in hind sight, is the looking-the-other-way. In my case not only of the turning the blind eye by the majority of the petrified co-workers, but also by my family doctor who chose to believe a psychiatrist who was very quick to find me some sort of “paranoid disposition” – an expedient but invalid because non-existent diagnostic in the DSM IV - A psychiatrist with imagination but also a dose of laziness as he refused to read a 1-page letter by one young lawyer who acknowledged that I was being ganged on at the office and offered to speak to him.

But even that young lawyer was to later turn on me, begging me in rather angry terms to no longer get her involved into my story since she had a career to pursue in our small legal community.

Nicole seemed to still be nonplussed as to the why of bullies behaviour. There IS an explanation of such cruelty: I found it in the outstanding book of Dr. Marie-France Hirigoyen, a French psychiatrist, published around 1999. It was quickly translated in 20 languages. The title in English is “Stalking the Soul”. It saved my life in that her description and explanation comforted me and convinced me not to jump from that bridge after all. She gives a rather flattering description of the typical targets of bullies: high standards and ethics, consciensiousness, quiet confidence and competence, and above all, a peaceful, non-confrontational attitude. Weaker individuals are prepared to try dirty tricks to eliminate us expecting we will not react and keep our composure.

Like for all bullied worker, it was Nicole's very resilience, keeness, enthusiasm, competence that got her in trouble. As for the bystanders who look the other way, Dr. Hirigoyen explains they are scared to be the next target if they spoke up.

I too, like Nicole, had offered resilience: I had defiantly posted an oversize cartoon with a quote from Winston Churchill, saying “Never… never… never give up”. When I saw the escalating pattern of how they were trying to find fault with me, I started to carry a hidden tape recorder and managed to gather very very damming evidence. I only wanted to stock my arsenals to defend myself metter next time, naively thinking that upper management would rescue me if I showed what was being done to me. Turned out they were in the loop too and I heard of a year-end-bonus if payroll was lightened up of bigger tickets for older workers. Anyway, I never got around to play my evidence at work, as I had to go on sick leave with Major Clinical Depression before the next round.

Two months into my sick leave, which I spent, to no avail, trying to mend things with the Anti-Harassment Committee (efforts which proved futile, this Committee uttering its own set of threats … also taped) I learned that the firm had to wind up abruptedly, after 75 years of practice. Against the advice of my doctor, no longer feeling the power of my bully boss about to jump ship like everybody else, I made a point of returning to work for those last few days. The idea being to seek closure by asking directly questions (with the tape still running in my pocket) as to why such an hostility. It was all very surreal! One co-worker screamed at me “I hate you, just because you are you”.

Because of considerable damage to my health incurred at my place of work, as a result of actions that were described as unacceptable in our office by decree and policy, I felt confident to obtain compensation from our Workers Compensation Board. This was not to take place. The administrative tribunal who heard my case sounded more like Spanish Inquisitors: it blatantly gave its own twist to my ironclad evidence. Worse yet is the fact that despite having no medical background whatsoever, the “chair” had no qualms substituting her own impression of a “pre-existing medical diagnosis ” to the many expert reports that, in the end, cleared me of any psychological pre-condition or mental disorder.

The half a dozen reporters I agreed to share my story and documentation with were all shocked by my facts and enthusiastic at writing pieces. Those, I was told, ultimately had impact on readership. But, oddly, even if I had signed releases authorizing the use of my real name, some papers or media those reporters worked for chose not to use my name, fearing themselves the consequences of corporate bullying now targetting them.

Not only did I fail to obtain closure, and ended up unable to work normal hours because of the PTSD, and was left with a legal bill of $10,000.

And then they wonder why bullying changes your life forever.

Nicole Cunningham's story about work-place harassment resonated deeply, it was well told and very moving. I too would have enjoyed listening to the full interview on air, but I applaud your harmless gambit for listener feedback, very clever.

Your story about workplace sabotage took me back many years ago when I too was bullied and sabotaged by my direct supervisor, a female. This incident ends with satisfying closure. Call it karma, or how the universe works it out. I had been employed by a company for several years and was happy to receive a promotion to a different dept. The bullying began 3 months after i transferred to the new position. I think she might have become jealous. The new supervisor sabotaged me in the same ways that you were sabotaged, with similar side effects. I shared my situation with her manager but it back-fired and feeling like I had no one else to turn to for help, I quit the job after 6 months of hell. I didn't share why I quit at the exit interview, because I didn't want to burn any bridges, and I thought they really didn't care anyway. I had not been the first victim of the bully. Anyway, my departure resulted in a whole new career path which turned out better than it might ever have turned out with that job. Six years later, I was recruited back to that same company in a superior position...and salary! I was told that soon after I had quit, the old bully manager had been demoted, transferred to an undesireable location and eventually she quit. Ha! So I agreed to come back, and soon after I happened to meet up with the old bully-manager's manager..the one I had told my problem to yrs ago. He apologized, and I told him I understood how he might not have fully grasped the severity of the bullying, but it all worked out better for me. Over those six yrs, the company took on a "help us help you" philosophy which was surprisingly refreshing. Overall, I learned from the experience that it is never okay to tolerate workplace abuse (or any other kind), and one should get help and/or quit as soon as possible. It is also important to build up a network and to support others with whom you work because what goes around does come around.

I'm so happy to see I wasn't the only one unhappy with being manipulated into coming here to hear the end of the bullying story. It seems though from the moderators response on this thread that you won't be doing it again. Good on you for listening to the feedback. Those of us who worked out that you had to click on the mob story to hear the end of the bully story appreciate it.

El Magnifico should seriously consider writing a book on "Revenge - How to Deal Intelligently With Workplace Bullies"

I would be first in line to purchase a copy!!!

What he did with this knucklehead was nothing short of BRILLIANT!!!!

WELL DONE SIR!!!

And as for you Mr. Kelly - Please keep bringing us these gems!!

I agree with the other posters. I was enjoying the story on the radio in my car, when, much to my dismay, I was directed to the website to hear the rest of the story. It's fine to provide more details on the website, but the story should be completed during the broadcast. Next time, I will likely change the station as soon as an interesting story begins, so as not to be disappointed. Thanks to the person, who thought of that brilliant idea.