In the rest of the world, it’s crisis time; in The Hague, all is calm, all is quiet. But the Dutch prime minister will be under fire from MPs as soon as his holiday ends. Wind war with the Germans, refugees live in poverty and how filling up your supermarket trolley helps to lose those holiday pounds.

Dutch PM dances through crisis
European leaders have come scurrying home from their family holidays to deal with the euro crisis, but where is Dutch Prime Minister Mark Rutte, asks NRC Handelsblad? “The only place where the PM was spotted was at Dance Valley festival last Saturday.”

In times of calamity, there are two narratives for political leaders, explains NRC: “Remain invisible and concede credit points for lack of leadership or come back, look like all is under control and instil trust.”

But “a Dutch premier can only do very little. His words won’t exert any influence on international markets. The reality is that the Netherlands has to follow what Germany decides,” explains Paul ‘t Hart, a public administration professor at the University of Utrecht.

Daniel Diermeier, a German lecturer at the US Kellogg School of Management, thinks otherwise. He remembers how former chancellor Gerhard Schröder cut short his vacation in 2002 when the Elbe burst its banks, and then got himself re-elected. “What can he do about it, you may ask? Walk around with sandbags? No, a politician has to show that he’s concerned. That’s the way to placate the public.”

At least Nero played the fiddle as Rome burned down
But the PM will first have to mollify MPs, angry with Mr Rutte for presenting confusing figures on the amount being donated by the public sector to save Greece. “Rutte under fire” headlines AD, referring to the collective rage among Dutch parliamentarians.

Prime Minister Rutte claimed three weeks ago during an emergency meeting of European leaders that the bailout package to Greece amounted to a total of 109 billion euros, with 50 billion coming from the private sector, explains de Volkskrant. But that sum didn’t add up, as it turns out. The 50 billion to be paid by the banks is on top of the 109 billion.

There’s even more confusion about the figure pledged until 2014 and the amount promised until 2020, seemingly in the region of 215 billion euros. Democrats D66 leader Alexander Pechtold makes a plea to the PM: “Rutte, tell us the story!”

Both the Socialists and Green Left especially deplore the PM’s “blasé attitude”. “A fire is raging around us, but we only see a premier enjoying himself at Dance Valley festival,” grumbles Green Left PM Bruno Braakhuis in AD.

De Volkskrant points out that Mr Rutte will have to do his utmost to convince his opposition colleagues to dance to his tune: Geert Wilders’ Freedom Party – which has a deal with the minority coalition to support the government in parliament – “doesn’t want to give one cent to Greece”.

The Democrats also accrue further political capital from Rutte’s holiday-making. In an interview in AD, Mr Pechtold rejects “villainous comments” comparing Rutte to Nero, “who at least played the fiddle as Rome was burning down”, but he does feel Rutte lacks “a sense of urgency and leadership”.

Save the “last Dutch wilderness” from the Germans
As if to compensate for the lack of street riots in Dutch cities, populist De Telegraaf found a different fight to pick. “Border row with Germans” screams the main front page headline.

German energy concern EWE wants to build a wind turbine park just off the northern Dutch island of Schiermonnikoog in the Wadden Sea to supply 100,000 households with power.

“The Germans say they’re building the wind park in their own territorial waters, while our country is firmly of the opinion that this section of the North Sea is Dutch territory and they need to apply for a permit to build,” argues De Telegraaf.

“We thought we were building in German territorial waters,” says a spokesman for EWE. “We already have a German permit from Oldenburg.”

The society for the protection of the Dutch Wadden Sea is also resisting the wind park. “Flora and fauna would be threatened and the noise during the construction would force away rare animals like the porpoise.”

Diplomatic efforts to resolve the border tiff have repeatedly failed. Prime Minister Rutte has brought up the matter in Berlin, but “it’s difficult when there are no clear agreements,” laments the foreign ministry.

Dutch refugees live below poverty line
“One in three refugees lives below the poverty line” headlines Trouw, taking up a different cause.

And the worst has yet to come, argues Dorine Manson, director of the Dutch Council for Refugees: “The government’s proposal to make refugees pay for their own integration and Dutch language courses will only exacerbate their plight. They’ll start running up debts and trail even further behind.”

On average, 6.2 percent of the Dutch population live under the poverty line – 10,000 euros per annum for families – compared with 30 percent for refugees, quotes Trouw. And only five percent of refugees have managed to move up into the “average” category to earn in excess of 30,000 euros.

Fill up your trolley and lose weight
With all the global talk on market losses, AD dedicates front page coverage to gains of a different sort – love handles filling out after weeks of vacation.

Research from Rotterdam’s Erasmus University advises anyone who wants to lose weight to use a trolley rather than a basket in the supermarket. “Carrying a basket tends to make us to pick out sweet foods,” claims psychologist Bram van den Bergh.

It’s all about the arm posture. “Bending your arm strengthens the message that you deserve a reward. Because of that feeling, people buy chocolate, for example.”

No doubt, Prime Minister Rutte will return leaner than even from his holiday - after all that dancing.